High School and Church

It is hard for me to believe that I have been out of high school for almost 20 years.  I still remember walking in the high school building as a sophomore (we had a junior high that was 7^th, 8^th and 9^th grades).  I was excited to be starting the end of my days as student.  I was also anxious about where everything was and how I would fit into the school. 

I was on the football team, so I had already been exposed to some of the upper classmen.  But that didn’t stop the fear of getting to know other people.  I can only imagine the anxiety someone must have when they just move to a new area and have to start a new high school.  The fear of which group will accept or reject you is very real to a 15 year old.  You try so hard to find a few people that will like you and become friends.  Often times the new person is rejected by the other students because of how they look, act, or any other ridiculous reason teenagers come up with.  Kids are made to feel like outsiders for a very long period or are even picked on for being them.  The new person is only new for a short period of time, but inside they will always be a little different from the others.   Even if they are accepted in the new school, then they fall into a “click”.  Every high school has several different groups.  When I was there, we had athletes, band members, Goths, nerds, pot heads, and many other groups.  Rarely did you see anyone be accepted by more than one group at a time.  And if there was that rare person, they were not fully committed to either group. 

It’s funny how now as I get older I can still see the characteristics of high school when I go to a new church.  I still get the excitement of starting something new.  I also get the anxiety of not knowing where to go or if I will be accepted within the congregation.  I remember pulling in the parking lot and my wife asked me if we were parking in the visitors parking.  I said no, that I didn’t want to park up front.  What I was thinking was I didn’t want everyone to know that we were new.   I parked in the normal parking spots with everyone else.  We walked into the building and luckily found familiar faces waiting to go to Sunday school.  I only spoke to 6 or 7 people that day and 5 of them were the friends that we knew would be there. 

We have continued to go back to the church on a regular basis, but I have not figured out how to be accepted in the “clicks” around the church.  I have met some of the other people at the church but I don’t feel part of any of the groups.  Now I sit and wonder if I can feel isolated going to a new church, then how does a new believer feel.  When they hear that Christ accepts them for who they are and where they are in life but the church they attend doesn’t feel very welcoming, where does that leave the new Christian?  They figure Christ really must not care about them.  They don’t feel the love and warmth that should flow from other Christians based solely on the fact that they are isolated at church.  The one place that should welcome people and help them to feel accepted ends up pushing new believers out. 

Unlike high school, a new Christian has a choice to stay or go.  It is the congregation of any church that helps make that decision.  The more a church stays glued to the “clicks” that get formed and stay together, the quicker it is for people to get frustrated and walk out the doors to never return.  I’ve never read where God wants churches to be exclusive for people that you like or fit in with you.  The purpose of the church is to be a meeting place for all believers to come together in worship and fellowship.  It is time for the church to act more like a reflection of God and less like a high school.  We the church, need to take notice of the new faces that walk in and make sure they feel welcome to the body.  Because you know that Satan is always there to put doubt in a new Christians mind and make them feel like the new kid walking into high school for the first time.  So we must decide now, do we make everyone feel welcome and glad they are choosing our church or will we allow Satan a foot hold in their life?